AS the year 2014 comes to an end this week, let’s take time to reflect on some topics that kept this column running. Wedding can sometimes seem difficult to organise but with the right mind set, right reading material and right people around, you can create a wedding that is completely, utterly yours. We will pick some topics that can help you create a wedding that is uniquely yours to fit your style, personality and taste from start to finish. This has got nothing to do with how much you spend on your day but it means knowing who you are.
The wedding rings make a profound statement of union between two people, symbolising love, eternity and it indicates that the wearer is married. It is worn on the fourth finger because people believed that a vein ran directly from this finger to the heart.
Kunda from Ndola wanted to know if men should wear an engagement ring, the answer will always be no as they are the ones who engages a woman. The purpose of an engagement is to show that there is a promise of marriage being made from a man to a woman. It is sad to note that married men are shunning away from wearing marriage rings so one tend to wonder what message they are sending.
Many innocent women have been killed by wives of married men with naked fingers who shun from wearing rings because they claim they hate jewelry and yet a wedding band should not be seen as burden or something worn without any meaning.
Selecting the mother of groom’s (MOG) attire can put you in a dilemma with the wide variety of choices that you would have to select from. You can wear anything from an elegant gown to a jacket and skirt suit or any kind of formal wear. The attire you wear is as important as the groom’s and bride’s attire even if you are not the star of the wedding and you do not really have a role to play. Choose a style that describes who you are, navy blue is the number one most requested colour for the MOG, do not worry about looking matronly because there are plenty of elegant formal looks that are both appropriate and fashionable.
A memorable wedding takes one year on average to plan, take one step at a time the longer time frame means that you are under less pressure and could have fun planning. Always plan ahead don’t procrastinate, don’t sweat and don’t lose weight, only do things that you can afford, try not to do anything wedding related two weeks before the wedding enjoy your day and don’t forget to have a couple’s private moment just as husband and wife throughout your wedding day.
Planning a wedding takes 1 year, you might plan it in 6 months because of the other projects you are trying to put up. The time frame is short but all you have to do is prepare yourself mentally, tell your mind that it’s only 6 months, don’t panic, stick to the budget and be flexible.
Many brides and grooms have failed to have a wedding because they are wrongly advised that the money they have is not enough and yet there is no fixed amount for one to have a memorable wedding.
When planning a low budget wedding work out what you can realistically afford as your budget for the event. The wedding expenses can be broken down into several categories to help you budget your wedding day a lot easier. Start with your main and most expenses costs for your wedding day to get an idea of where you stand on your wedding budget. These are reception venue, wedding attires, rings, food and honeymoon all of these parts of your wedding are important and require the most costs out of anything else.
When you receive an invitation card from a friend or relative it is just the beginning of an exciting wardrobe hunt as a female invited guest do not out stage the bride, avoid white and use good judgment if the invitation does not specify the formality of the event. Do not wear attires that are too revealing, too short, do not go to a wedding almost dressed, kindly dress up or down. Men are also culprits of inappropriate dressing, avoid soccer jerseys, t-shirts, jean trousers, this is not a casual event.
The role of a knife girl is what people are failing to understand, dances portrayed, attire worn by the girls. Assigning a girl to be a knife bearer is not wrong at all as it is creativity. It beautifies the wedding and cheers up the invited guests. This role is optional, the girl should be part of the flower girls, dressed in a white dress and not club wear, no make-up, no painted nails and she should be trained by her parents who should also pick the song.
This year Zambia celebrated its 50th Independence Anniversary, in the wedding industry this can be used as a memorable wedding theme. The good thing about this theme inspiration is that it can work well on any season. The colours on the flag works well all year round, ever since Chipolopolo won the AFCON all weddings have gone green, orange, red and black.
For the centerpieces the art work made by different tribes in Zambia can be use, as a way to showcase the rich cultural art work one can find throughout Zambia and names of Presidents and first ladies can be used instead of table number.
Zambia @ 50 wedding stories was collected by going back 50 years in order to learn more. These weddings were stress-free, memorable and affordable because both families were in one accord. The community and invited guests played a vital role as they brought in food stuffs from their respected homes as a way of celebrating the couple. The bridal party consisted of the chief bridesmaid and best man, no matron, no flower girls or page boys.
The role of master of ceremonies is to keep the wedding event moving forward in a timely manner, keeping to the schedule and helping as best as you can. It is because of this that you need to be involved in the planning process not to make a decision but to make sure that you are aware of how the order of events needs to occur, this role is different from a role that a comedian plays at a stand-up comedy, be the master of ceremony, not the master of confusion.
One of the regular readers wanted to find out why most weddings tend to invite prominent people or politicians to be the guest of honor, is it because an ordinary person cannot do a good speech? The role of a wedding guest of honor does not necessarily need to be given to a prominent person, anyone can give a good speech what is required is proper preparation. What makes a speech memorable is not who delivered it but how and what was delivered. It is better to give six speeches a year, which are good than twenty half of which are bad because guests will quickly forget your good efforts, but always remember the times when you bored or irritated them.
The speech delivered by the bride’s father comes first then others follow as laid down on the wedding program. This speech has to be brief, sweet and should give the guests the desire to hear more, this is why it just has to lay a strong foundation. The historical opening only means that the father relates to some past fasts, then brings the guests up to date and then gets on with the main point of his speech. If kept brief it can paint a picture of how good your daughter has been her character, childhood accomplishments and skills must always get the speech off to a good start. Avoid giving out too much information.
In the Zambian wedding industry many decorators have come on board, this is good the only problem is the motive behind one entering into this industry. Some have the passion while others are taking advantage as it is a hot business at the moment as this will help cater for school fees.
As a wedding decorator it is helpful to know thy self as you are responsible for decorating the entire wedding event. Creativity is essential to wedding decorations since you must turn a client’s vision into reality. Being creative will also help you to stand out of the crowd, when decorating one need to create elegant and creative spaces during the wedding ceremonies and reception.
For one to make it as a successful decorator, you must be very creative, transform any venue to an extent that even the owner of the place will fail to recognize it and also the invited guests fail to believe that it is the venue they have been coming to for the past weekends to attend weddings.
As the year ends a lot of weddings, kitchen parties are taking place every weekend. Many brides and grooms are always saying they do not have money to hold a reception venue so they are having a wedding ceremony with a complete bridal party, go for a photo session then kitchen party later, no wedding reception, they think it is cheaper this way. What is surprising is that we are seeing wedding reception kitchen party combined.
Invitation card says kitchen party waiting patiently for the bride to come in the traditional way, guess who comes in unexpected! The bridal party dancing like no man’s business, why not have wedding receptions instead. A kitchen party is not a place for entertainment or where sober meets beer, the original purpose of a kitchen party is to teach brides valuable lessons on how to successfully run a home by women of wisdom so that they too can be able to teach brides coming after them, the way things are at the moment concerns have been raised by men that there are no lesson being taught and these events are not worth having, yes men you are right! A wife will leave home then a knife will come back at 21:00 hours drunk, this shows that even the organizes homes are not in order, you cannot keep married women up to this time, what time do they prepare dinner for their husbands?
A kitchen party is unique and portrays the rich Zambian culture; things of value should be added. When l asked the matron and organizers why the bridal party had to dance at such an event the answer was it is the devil at work, who is being termed as the devil here and why is the devil part and parcel of the organizing committee. Till next year enjoy the celebrations, and congratulations to those marring on New Year’s Day.
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