PLANNING a multi-cultural wedding is not easy and it can send you to the Emergency Room (ER).
Some couples have opted to hold two different ceremonies on two separate days, while others have opted for the groom’s culture because he is the one marrying while others have incorporated all the two cultures in one celebration.
Whatever, the reason, the celebrations have to go on, enjoying every moment and not having one party felling neglected.
This type of wedding is complex and sensitive; in the wedding industry it is called double trouble, bringing different cultures, countries, continents together.
As a wedding planner, you must understand the cultural values, how they organise their wedding cerebrations, where traditional elements can be added, blend in two cultures for a short period of time like two hours for the reception, what is more worse is when they came with their own wedding planner who wants things to go their way.
In some countries they will speak their minds; they don’t care whether you are mother of the bride or mother of the groom, they just don’t care, other stand where we knee, give a hand shake where we do not; so all these important things have to been taken into consideration.
This is a type of event that must be organized and handled with wisdom. Brides and grooms, you have to understand and learn these cultural values, it is not easy but worth it as that is the only way you will live to enjoy your marriage.
When my niece said “I do” to a South African, the family of the groom demanded that a kitchen party, wedding ceremony and cerebration be conducted in Zambia so that all her (bride) friends, neighbors and family can attend, then on the groom’s side, aunties and parents attended.
The wedding ceremony, reception and tradition would be repeated in South Africa where only the mother and father to bride would attend.  This type of arrangement is very expensive, I can assure you.
Whether for religious differences, geographical challenges or differing family expectations more couples are opting to throw two full weddings with two ceremonies and two receptions.
Planning and executing two weddings often leads to a new set of problems, whether it is deciding whom to invite to which ceremony or fielding demands to know which wedding is the “real’ one.
Couples who plan two weddings are not necessary big- spending party people looking to double their fun.
Often each family assumes responsibility for one event, including much of the planning and cost, since the intention is usually to alleviate family stress and fulfill wishes from both sides, but some people inevitably will think a couple is trying to “milk it” anyway to head off those skeptics, couples tell guests they are having a “split” wedding not two weddings, that way you are “splitting” the excitement.
Couples should articulate a clear reason for having two events; you need a distinction that everyone is going to understand. It helps to use labels such as Namibian wedding and later Zambian wedding.
Some parents want to show off their kids and invite their friends.
The bride and groom who have two wedding for cultural reasons have the added challenge of understanding the rituals of another culture.
The Guest list is an important highlight, so most guests are invited to only one ceremony but immediate family members attend both, the celebration theme with elements of different cultures and nationalities.
Pick a ceremony site that will accommodate your wedding and know their rules to each other, but for a multicultural marriage to stand the test of time important topics like faith. Do not feel you have to put all your cultural eggs in one basket.
To make this function memorable and elegant just blend in the most aspects from each culture, pick the elements that are loud to start with then pick those that have a similar mix, incorporate them as smooth as ice cream so that the Zambian invited guests will feel as if they are in Namibia and vice versa.
Cultures can be put in centerpieces, replace table numbers with the word love in different languages from the two countries.
Food is important to every function so get a chef who knows how to prepare food from both countries so that everyone is catered for and this is very affordable. Music being the food of love should be allowed to be played loud and representing the two countries. These multicultural weddings not only strengthen families but countries as well.
God recognizes the other forms of marriage which are court and traditional and He honors them, usually there is a reception to entertain guests after any of these types of ceremonies.
This is mainly a social event where guests are refreshed and thanked for taking time out to celebrate with the couple.
Make a comprehensive list of all expenditure items that are required for all ceremonies you will be having. You need to consult with people who have been married through the same routes you want to take.
Cost all these items and arrive at an estimate, confirm all your income sources, that is if people are promising to  help you out in one way or other get firm commitments of these ones but do not depend on unreliable promises or people.
Attend other ceremonies (Church reception, court and tradition) to get a feel of the things that are necessary and arrangements that need to be made so you have to make sure you attend other ceremonies in the church where you plan to get married: this is in fact a compulsory assignment. Take notes of the protocol arrangements, the order of things and others that are important.
This will help you plan adequately for yours.
Decide on a budget and stick to it as much as possible; suggestions from people that will increase your costs without any corresponding contributions from such should be treated lightly.
Your budget will influence the timing of the events and how elaborate or otherwise the ceremonies will be.
It is advisable to keep things simple and to spend only as much as you want to and can afford. Get it right after all to every wedding there is a marriage so do not channel all your efforts or resources to the wedding and forget about the home you will be living in after the wedding and also do not be tempted to think that the wedding is a business investment where you spend to get returns.
Take responsibility for your wedding, do not expect others to be as concerned as yourselves and don’t expect that others will run around for you.
As the bride and groom you might not be able to do everything yourself but you need to make adequate arrangements and supervise those arrangements.
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