Too much sex drains wife
Published On November 21, 2015 » 18583 Views» By Hildah Lumba » Court News, Latest News
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From the courts LogoBy SARAH MWANZA –

A WOMAN of Lusaka’s George Township shocked a fully-packed Matero local court with an unusual revelation of how her husband demanded sex everyday even when she was on her periods.
Jacqueline Kalenga, 42, further astonished the court when she revealed that in their 19-year-long marriage, her husband even demanded sex when she was in labour with her last born child – a situation that led to her giving birth in the house.
Ms Kalenga narrated that she once fainted when her husband had weird anal sex with her since the pain was unbearable.
“This man will kill me with sex; he does not get tired, even when I am fully pregnant he demands for sex,” she said.
The woman has since sued her husband, George Nyekesha, 46, for divorce saying that he is a sex maniac.
Shockingly, Nyekesha accepted all allegations levelled against him and testified that sex to him was the major reason he married Ms Kalenga.
He said he had a right to make love to his wife whenever he deemed it fit even when she was on her monthly periods or in labour.
“I can make love to my wife in which ever manner I want because I married her for sex first and love later,” he said.
Ms Kalenga said it was clear that her husband needed a younger woman who would give him all the weird sex styles because she was old and not strong enough to sustain the pressure.
The two got married in 1996 when the sexual abuse started and that he never used to provide for her and the five children they had.
“The only thing that my husband knows to do best is sex, because he does not even support me financially,” she said.
Magistrate Lewis Mumba, sitting with Pauline Newa, granted the two divorce and ordered Nyekesha to compensate his wife with K15,000.
The custody of their three children was given to Kalenga and Nyekesha was ordered to be maintaining them with K250.
The court further advised Nyekesha to stop behaving like an animal because it was inhuman for a normal person to behave like that.

‘No food no sex’


A CHAZANGA Township woman admitted denying her husband sex because of his failure to provide food for the family.
Jessica Zulu, 23, also said her husband used to go home shaved, a sign that he had another woman he was sleeping with.
This was a case in which Jessica sued Felix Zulu, 26, for divorce after the two failed to resolve their marital disputes.
The two, who got married in 2010 and have three children, started having marital problems last year when Zulu stopped buying food for the family.
Jessica said she saw no reason to be making her husband happy by happily giving him sex when he was not buying food for her.
She said she needed energy to be able to sexually satisfy her husband but now that he was failing to provide food to energise her, he had no right to demand for sex.
However, Jessie said at one time she wanted to have sex with him but decided not to because she knew that he was shaved by another woman.
“I tried to touch my husband with the hope that he would respond but he woke up and decided to go and have sex with his girlfriend,” she said.
She said she never saw any need for her to continue feeding her husband and allow him to have sex with her.
“I believe that sex is a reward that a man gets from the wife when he is able to provide for the family,” she said.
In defence, Zulu said he was having a love affair with another woman because his wife had been denying him sex for five months.
Zulu said he still loved his wife but he found another woman because he wanted to be having sex.
He said as a married young man it was impossible for him to stay for months without sex, hence he was scared of defiling a child.
“I decided to find an elderly woman to be having sex with because if I continued enduring a sexless life, I would have ended up defiling a young girl and go to jail,” Zulu said.
Zulu said contrary to his wife’s assertions, he always provided for the family and that Jessica chased him from the bedroom, forcing him to spend nights on the couch.
Senior local court magistrate Lewis Mumba, sitting with Pauline Newa, reconciled the couple and ordered the man to start providing for the family and the woman to stop denying him sex.

Wife’s own slave


A MAN of Lusaka’s Chipata Township narrated to a Matero local court how his wife reduced him to a servant in his own house.
Sipiyano Phiri, 26, told the court that his wife wanted to be kept like a princess, demanding that he financially provides for her and do all household chores.
This was a case in which Phiri sued Helen Mwanza, 30, for divorce as he was tired of performing household chores as if he was not a married man.
The two got married in 2011 and have two children. They started having problems in their marriage three months after they wedded.
Phiri said every time he returned home from work he used to find that his wife had not done any household chores.
He said instead of resting after working the whole day, he used to do the household chores because he was not used to live in a dirty place.
“Plates used to stay for three days in the house if I didn’t wash them, making the house stink, a situation which I was not used to,” Phiri said.
He added that he even used to cook for his wife, besides doing other household chores.
“My wife doesn’t know how to do anything. I wash the plates, clean the house and cook for her as if I am the one she married,” Phiri said.
He said he had on several occasions tried to tell his mother-in-law but that yielded no positive results because she used to support her lazy daughter.
Phiri further said that his wife did not respect him and insulted him in the presence of his friends.
“I am tired of doing all the household chores for my wife, I financially provide for her and when I go home instead of resting I start doing cooking for her,” he said.
In defence, Mwanza told the court that her husband wanted to divorce her because he was having a love affair with a certain woman from their church.
Mwanza said she used to differ with her husband because he used to spend most of his time at church than with her.
She said it was unfair for her husband to speak ill about her because she had always performed her duties as a wife.
“I always argue with my husband because he is having a love affair with another woman and whenever I confront him he gets upset,” he said.
Senior local court magistrate Lewis Mumba, sitting with Pauline Newa, granted the two divorce and ordered Phiri to compensate Mwanza with K5,000.
The custody of their two children was given to Mwanza and Phiri was ordered to be maintaining them with K300 monthly.

Charms in bathing water


A FORTY-THREE-YEAR-OLD man of Lusaka West failed to maintain his marriage after his wife put charms in his water for bathing.
John Sinau stunned the Kanyama local court when he revealed how he found his wife, Margaret Tembo, 32, of Garden House Township, dropping herbs in the water he was about to bath on November 10 this year.
The court heard that it was when Tembo was about to drop the charms in Sinau’s water that her husband appeared, prompting the wife to run away, only to return home after some time.
This is a case in which Sinau was dragged to court by Tembo for reconciliation after the attempt by his wife to put charms in the water he was about to bath.
The two got married in August 2015 after dowry was paid and have a child together.
Tembo told senior local court magistrate Sarah Nyendwa, who was sitting with Ackim Phiri, that it was on November 10, 2015 that the couple differed over the charms his wife had wrapped on her chitenge before attempting to put them in her husband’s bath water.
Tembo said that the charms were meant to be put in her porridge but that Sinau could not believe her and instead accused her of wanting to put them in his bath water in an attempt to kill him.
She added that Sinau beat her and when she showed him the charms he objected saying the charms he saw were black.
“When we sat with his sister he told her that I wanted to kill him. I was afraid I told the community chairman but he maintained that the charms he saw were black and he warned me that if I didn’t show him the black charms he should not find me home,” Tembo said.
In defence, Sinau said on the material day when he knocked off from work he found Tembo in the bathroom attempting to put charms in his bath water. He said the charms were black and wrapped in a white plastic.
Sinau said his wife bolted when he told her to give him the charms, leaving him with her chitenge material in his hands.
In passing judgment, senior local court magistrate Nyendwa failed to reconcile the couple.
“You men like using charms in Chibuku Shake-Shake, same applies to women. They also like putting the stuff in porridge. If there was nothing wrong, you (Tembo) would not have run away with the charms, so reconciliation has failed,” Ms Nyendwa said.

Wife pours urine on hubby


A LUSAKA man narrated in the Kanyama local court how his wife poured urine on him when she came back home late.
Mazuba Mainza, 39, of Garden House was greeted by urine splashed from a chamber pot by his wife, Miniva Phiri, 33, of Chawama when he delayed to open the door for her after she returned home from collecting a debt from the neighbourhood.
This was a case in which Phiri sued Mainza for divorce after undergoing a number of problems caused by her sisters-in-law as they were trying to control the brother’s marriage.
The two got married in 2010 and have two children together. Mainza partially paid dowry in monetary form as well as chickens and goats.
Phiri said she was very disappointed in the manner her sisters-in-law were trying to kick her out of the house, saying she was looking older than her husband going by the weight she had gained since 2011.
“In 2011, one of his sisters came home and demanded that I should leave as I was quickly getting older than my husband,” Phiri said.
Phiri said after continued pestering from her in-laws, she requested her husband that the two relocate to Garden House, but the sisters-in-law opposed the move.
She said her husband had also stopped eating from the matrimonial home as he only went there to sleep after drinking sprees.
Phiri said her sisters-in-law had also accused her of having killed their mother who died of depression after she (Phiri) continued staying with the family even when she was not wanted.
In defence, Mainza said he never wanted to remain in marriage with Phiri, who charged that she wanted reconciliation instead of divorce.
“She does not have respect. I was in a red T-shirt when she poured urine on me and I fear that we may kill each other,” Mainza said.
Passing judgment, senior local court senior magistrate Daniel Phiri, sitting with Ackim Phiri and Sarah Nyendwa, granted the couple divorce.
“Court finding: Lack of seriousness from the very beginning due to lack of marriage counsellors and the woman has failed to challenge the husband on the allegations,” Mr Phiri said.
He ordered Mainza to compensate his wife with K3,000, starting with K1,000 and K250 thereafter coupled with K400 for the children per month.

Zam-cab pusher ‘starves’ wife


A TWENTY-SEVEN-YEAR-OLD man is on the verge of losing his marriage for denying his wife sex and instead opting to marry another woman from the village.
Amos Kanunga, a barrow boy of Makeni Villa, has been denying his 19-year-old wife Martha Tembo sex for three consecutive weeks for no apparent reason.
The two got married on December 12, 2009 after Kanunga partly paid dowry, and have two children.
Problems started during Tembo’s first pregnancy as Kanunga started insulting her as well as sending her away from home while proposing love to other girls.
This was a case in which Tembo dragged Kanunga to the Kanyama local court for reconciliation after discovering that her husband’s behaviour had gone out of hand.
Tembo said that despite the couple being counselled by different individuals, Kanunga’s behaviour was becoming unbecoming.
“Since 2010 I can’t even count the number of times people have counselled us. He was saying he wants to marry someone from his village,” Tembo said.
During cross-examination, the visibly annoyed Tembo said she made a mistake as it was divorce she wanted and not reconciliation.
In defence, Kanunga admitted that what his wife said was true.
“She is right, but I still love her so much, get home please “mama”, mother of myself and children,” Kanunga said.
It was at this point that Geshon Sakala, the woman’s witness and father, said Kanunga was at fault in all the instances the couple was counselled.
In passing judgment, senior local court magistrate Daniel Phiri, sitting with Ackim Phiri and Serah Nyendwa, failed to reconcile the couple and instead advised Tembo to sue for divorce.
“The man is immature. The fact is the marriage was done whilst you were still young and you madam, you are free to sue for divorce,” Mr Phiri said.

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